month after month after 29.12.09.21:00

grow big, grow good, grow happy, kiddo ^^

what've been done before A year :countdown:

setelah tk kelewatan begitu banyak moment dan milestones utk dicatat, diingat, direkam, dan disimpan... masihlah pula hilang blackberry gemini putihnya... so im officially tracking down photos in some other's mobile phone or else... terutama utk bulan ke 7 s/d sekarang... fuh...

tapi juga setelah melewati banyak kekonyolan dan naik-turun kondisi tubuh (termasuk sakit roseola infantum di akhir bulan ke 10 sehingga smp skrg masih ada hutang imunisasi IPD), di bulan ke 11 ada banyaaaak yang baru yang canggih dan nyenengin. his name is shaka, and he used to act like a cute-sloppy baby boy. but he is now a toddler, still cute, and about to rise and shine ^^v bless u. cup.

first words : its still heard like a babbling, tapi sudah hampir pasti, adalah 'udah', 'mbak', 'papa', 'dadah'.... i will work more for 'mama' later -__-

first table food : gula garam colongan banyak di bulan ke 11 ini =D he's very demanding into foods. mulai dari kue basah tradisional nagasari, putu, kue temennya pukis favorit papa, honeystar mama, tahu goreng, ubi goreng, tempe goreng, banana berry di urban kitchen, paddle pop, conello disc, buavita mango..... biar kata icip-icip doang tetep aja terusan -__-' mudah-mudahan gapapalah... belakangan jg tk kasih keju, dan tk agak membebaskan diri sama dairy product dan telur.... masih ada reaksi sih, tapi sepertinya sdh jauh lebih baik..... mudah-mudahan semakin baik =) ....errrr.... tinggal tk harus nyari resep2 lagi skrg.....

seven teeth : nggak tau ada pengaruhnya atau nggak... tapi belakangan mimik di malam hari kembali menyakitkan... smp kemaren smp huru-hara di pagi buta...

more hair (seems) to grow =D

normal height and lower weight in the growth chart : sehat yuk sehat ah sehat yah ^_^ yang penting sehat, banyak milestones yang nunggu di bulan2 berikutnya.....

first gestures: pusiiing!! (pegang kepala pake 2 tangan dengan mimik dan intonasi sebel) - halo? (1 tangan nempel kuping sambil mimik dan intonasi bertanya, kalo megang/ngeliat handphone/telepon jg bereaksi begini) - dadah (dadah sama semua orang yg lagi dadahdadah, responnya yg in masih suka lemot :D) - tepuk tangan (atau pok'e'pok -__- ajarannya mba ina) - cicak! (langsung liat ke atas nyari cicak) - dungdung! (jitak/toyor kepala sendiri :D yg ini baru bisa hari ini) ....and all these, muncul di bulan ke11 semua! canggih kan =) dalam hal ini mbak ina jg cukup berjasa, tinggal arahannya harus lebih jelas supaya nggak muncul bahasa2 aneh yg menyesatkan... hihihi...

first animals: kucing, cicak, bebek (mungkin)

30 imaginary toys : are u sure wanting me to mention all? :D well, it involved mobile purse and casing, old socks, old newborn shoes, namecard holder, wetnapkin and huggies plastic packaging... they're just permanently rich and lovely ^_*

first step : na ah, he's just mastering crawling right after 'rambatan', he's just on the way, i'll take it easy =)

first (mama's favourite) gear : (hihihi kategori khusus buat mamanya)

peg perego Si stroller (very sturdy and comfy and still looking good at every occassion, tapi emg kalo sekarang udah waktunya dicuci sih -__- udah buluk bener...)

graco tea time highchair (must-have for growing a happy-eater)

hanamuguri carrier (sangat simpel... sebenernya (masih) tertarik sleepywrap tapi rada telat taunya :D)

pigeon food maker (sangat 'cukup' dan serbaguna utk awal mpasi)

enphilia cloth diaper (its comfy, cute, useful, local-made, and very affordable and worth for it's price! tapi masih tertarik sama moo-moo kow dan green nappy pull up si... =p)

avent reusable pads (asli berguna! asli murah! asli nyaman bgt dibandingin yg dispo!)

liquid talc mothercare (it seems fancy, but i found out its not, ...i mean, it really works!)

jumper carter's (easy and affordable, good textiles too... sayang nggak ada yg 12+)

cotton-ink classic shawl (baru punya sebentar, tapi langsung kerasa bgt gunanya, dibanding nursing shawl yg lain...)

blackberry (been a help since i haven't even have it, 1st friend after delivery, nice companion while breastfeeding, easy and compact moment recorder and distributor)

last but not least, THEURBANMAMA.COM (this is ain't ad info, and you can call me geeky to say that... even i was thinking to put this name right on my last posting on mother's day actually... to me, the portal's been a quite good companion since then, cool and easy people with pretty cool mind and attitude. i wonder them many times, on how they make me feels (at home, or at least not alone) i really heart them ^^

and so... lets just welcoming tomorrow =)

i hope i can post some pictures later.

love u my little man.

what to do after A year :countdown:

menjelang shaka 1 tahun, menjelang tahun baru, dan mumpung papanya shaka lagi nggak di rumah dan ngaja ikea-an terus... mama mau bikin planning...

planning ini dibuat dengan serius, dan diharapkan juga disertai dengan follow up financial planning yang sama seriusnya ^o^ hihihi...

:aslinya sih lagi abis-abisan... jadi yuk kita mimpi dulu aja:

MY WORLD OF SHAKA

2011 - shaka 1 tahun

#1 Belajar travel ^_^

sama oma, eyang, kakung, om, auntie, mama, papa, digilir deh satu-satu gapapa

buat warming up... pengenalan sama dunia luar, ahahaha =D luar negeri kalo bisa mah....

#2 Pindah rumah sendiri

rumah baru, kasur baru, dipan baru, lemari baru, meja makan baru, ... ayo kita sama-sama bilang amiiin..... ^^v

#3 Fropper bike by Okiedogs

uh... i really heart the design....

2012 - shaka 2 tahun

#1 Main sekolah-sekolahan

ikut paketnya di Cikal... insyaallah masih affordable dan bisa jadi tempat main-main dan pengenalan sekolah beserta proses belajar dan bersosialisasi yg nyenengin...

#2 (easi-peasi) working-mama again eh?

let's see the available vacancy in the dream school ya =)

#3 CRIB baru buat shaka

anak mama udah gede dooong, udah disapih, bobonya juga mulai sendiri ya.... ntar nyari tempat tidur serius ya... semacam daybed/box bayi yg agak besar yg desainnya memungkinkan utk co-sleeping sama mamapapa dan dipake s/d shaka 5tahunan, aman, dan, bisa jadi box lagi buat kalau punya adek lagi nantiii... ^_* (masih sangat suka cot 3in1 ini.... atau babybelle winston yg lebih murah, tapi katanya drop-side crib spt itu udah di US di-banned krn nggak aman... jd 3in1 cot ini masih sgt perrfect... oh i love customized design!)

2013 - shaka 3 tahun

#1 Entering playgroup

shining star it is??? let's see ^o^

#2 Mobil baru...

*eh!* ....hihihi, ayo bilang amiiin lagiii!

2014 - shaka 4 tahun

#1 Disneyland Hongkong!!!

it's said that it's perfect for toddler 3-5 years old... and me want touring Hongkong city!!

yuk piknik bertiga sama mamapapa... hap hap hap ^_^

2015 - shaka 5 tahun

#1 Shaka mau adek?

ready for a new family member? ready for another new happy world and joy?

*eh!* ^_^

ahahahaha ^^V *fingercrossed*

mother's day posting

:its not that im unblessed, but unlike another blessed daughter, i'd rather start by straightly saying, no i don't want to be like mom:

she is a fun person, actually. but she has this cranky mood making her somewhat hysterical. easily got panicked, or lost in a deep euphoria, or dramatically drown herself down by such imaginary fear and catastrophe. hwow, its a definitely unhealthy, yes? um... its just that i know that she is not her all the time. i mean, its time who has carried her all the way.

there was a time at school i would say that she is my role model, such an idol character. although i remember i was saying it because i didn't know who else i should admit. but i think its pretty something, at least for someone like me. well, i used to sort myself pretty well i guess. herself coming at my mind by the time isn't instant though. i mean, i remember that i really found certain facts along the way.

i cannot tell much about it. if you ever got a chance to meet her, you'll see. she is lovable, fun, chatty, a bit childish... errr.... or yes, child-like -___-' she is quite interesting, very lively comparing to me. she is such a free thinker trapped in a body full of norms and terms... maybe i'm a bit overrated here. but i think, thats a pretty good term too for her, overrated. ahaha, yes she's just that special.

but still, no lah, i don't want to be like her. and i think she actually wouldn't want me to be like her either. but ever heard the words "a man cursed for won't ever be like his dad, and a woman cursed for gotta be like her mom"... yeah, thats hell scarry... nooo, i don't want to be such an unstable adult laughing and weeping both effortlessly like mooom... gotta ground... gotta ground now...

its just, there's this one thing i found out after i delivered a baby. i was and i maybe still am such a weak, clumsy, careless, stubborn yet vulnerable person turning into a mom. my flaws leads me scared and worried. and by that point i realized, there's this one thing, i ultimately wanted from my mom. of all her flaws, characters, habbits, that could have been been passed to me, i hope there's this one thing (or if its possible, this one thing only =p) been through in my blood. my origin.

it was the love to be me. the happiness for being myself, and not wanting another. another person to be, another person to be with. another world to be lived. another heart and experiences to be in. yeah, of all her flaws i really wondered how she could made me that way. and heartfully hope, that at that point, i could do the same for my baby, for least. yeah, of all her flaws, eventually she filled me good enough.

so kiddo, hail to oma!!! and i, as a loving daughter, as usual, will just be there to poke her :D isn't that cute? ...happy mother's day mama. God knows how worthy you are. i know. and that's not the reason why i love you, so don't you worry :D HUG.

my ikea wishlist :revised:

Due to the cancellation of shaka birthday party ^_^ i sort my wishlist into this below:

SÖT BARNSLIG soft toy - all variant @ 0,90 SGD

NEGLINGE candlestick/tealight holder - 3pcs @ 0,90 SGD

KLADD bib assorted colours - 1 pack @ 3,90 SGD

MYSA STRA quilt 150x200 - 1pc @ 15 SGD

VITAMINER VIMPEL quilt cover and pillowcase 150 x 200 - 1 set @ 15 SGD

TRIPP tin with lid, set of 3 - 1set @ 6 SGD

being judgemental

i thought... i thought...

i thought its barely known everywhere that its not good being judgemental. especially among moms, parents...

ternyata harus menghadapi sendiri yg begituan -__- males deh capek deh cemen deh... nggak musim bgt kayanya... yea this is learning process. silence will do better next time.

ternyata juga, menjadi orang tua bisa mengembangkan komunitas baru. its just one thing, i really do hope i still can be my friend's friends someway.

but so far, theurbanmama, really do the best. ehk... mau nangis.

i dont care being geeky this time. its just too bad i cant set my self free out there...

penyakit asos...

ehk. please oh please smart moms... be polite, be positive, be wise, be good...

---habis dilukai ibunya, kena juga sama anaknya, damn!

so little time so much to do

beberapa postingan terakhir selalu isinya tentang waktu.... sok sibuk deh

dan hal itu akan ditandai dengan fakta yg berikut ini, gigi shaka udah 7 aja....

ITS ALREADY SEVEN AND I DONT KNOW WHEN - __ - !!#@!

jadi sebelum lupa mending diurut dulu giginya ya:

1. tengah kanan bawah ----> demam, flu pertama kali

2. tengah kiri bawah ----> muncul tak lama kemudian

3. tengah kanan atas

4. tengah kiri atas ----> flu pake sariawan, mau lebaran

5. taring kanan atas ----> kelewatan -__-

6. taring kiri atas ----> cranky bites

7. bawahnya taring kiri bawah (namanya apa ya...) ----> baru sadar tadi sore -__-'

....jadi agak deg2an sama gigi ke8.... melihat sejarah 3 pasang gigi sebelumnya, selalu ada cerita nggak asik disetiap pasangnya.... mudah2an yg ke 8 nanti jinak dan sehat ah, makannya aja yg tambah pinter dan alerginya berkurang :D sementara ta cariin orajel (murah) ah ke oma.... hohoho musti sikat gigi segera biar nggak gigis kaya mama (dan papa jg ternyata)....

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kembali ke #solittletimesomuchtodo .....

papa shaka kembali ke hutan sore ini, dan hashtag diatas merepresentasikan semuanya.

lately i got used to it. there are already a lot of things to be thanked though. really. why cant every people just accept it as it is. yea, we're human -__- thats why. okay, apologize taken then. being an adult is difficult, even if we're still on the way to it. im serious. well im using english now, thats a proof. im serious.

life is already so difficult there is no room for anger, jealousy hatred and greed. and yet it seems there is still so much of it. sad. RT Nadya_HutaGalng.

rasanya waktunya terlalu sedikit, bahkan untuk merespon (mengklarifikasi) setiap feedback.

Apalagi yang kurang,

Kalau kau punya matahari dan udara
Apalagi yang kurang,

Kalau yang terindah sudah kau dapatkan
Kalau kau berlari smakin cepat,

Saat kau bangun menjelang bersama cinta
Tanganmu tlah ada kehangatan,
Apalagi yang kurang

*potongan theme song telenovela akhir tahun 90an yg diindonesiakan dan masih terus terngiang :p it just sound so true

its not like im in the easy breezy mood right now, that i suddenly come out with such 'cheap' lyric from a 'cheap' movie like that... its just that *sigh* so little time so much to do. and one adult should deal and survived with many things. but basically, things are good. trust me.

back to my youth life, i would say...

"its not like im pregnant or something..., be calm..."

*well i haven't found any other ultimate daNg moment that fits me now...

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well oh well, senangnya bisa menulis lebih mudah :) udah pake speedy nih. meski kayanya org telkomnya agak2 trickie (bisa nggak abis2 deh ngomongin yg jelek2 :d udahan ah). koneksinya cepet. yummm! dan, template nya ganti lagi. demi menunjang kenyamanan menulis :D yg lama nggak klik aaaah... meski sebenernya yg ini jg bukan pilihan pertama, melainkan pilihan spontan keburu shaka bangun dan drpd blog masih berantakan sih :p pilihan pertama keduanya nggak compatible sama printilan bawaan asalnya sih...

i like this template though. not something i would basically use sih emang... tapi kadang2 spontanitas justru bisa tahan lama :D dan template ini agak2 mengingatkan pada kecintaan lama. um... i remind to some old times lately, me and the beauties. design, art, cool etsy things... not to mention architecture greatness... think i kinda miss it. honestly, i kinda miss being around those people who are trully in love with their lovely jobs and doing lovely works. na ah, im not saying working, because still, to me it really sounds like one whole day thing which just not sounds lovely by now :p i say, being around.

ah.... is there any possibility that one of them are open for such a laid-back freelancer........... maybe for a shopping companion, standby bazaar girl, matching fabrics, or else :p oh yeah this stupid daydreamer is asking for such vacancy. s1 arsitektur, good performance in a wellknown magz, in love with design, good english,.... masa nggak boleh sih temenin ikutan bazar sama belanja kaen aja.....

hehe... yea, im talking about crafty things here. kayanya terlalu jauh deh kalo mau ikutan di seputar arsitektur interior... dan lagi menemukan sangat sangat banyak desainer handicraft lokal yg baguuus.... adore them so much. they really seized my days lately. thats why i put them here :) in local founds label. must-see... and most of their product are must-have. *fingercrossed

oh by he way, im serious too in this part :) skrg lg usaha biar bisa deketdeket sama salah satunya. manusia emang banyak maunya, dulu mau buku, sekarang ngiler sama produk luculucu, yaudahlah biarin aja dong ah.

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shaka gimana shaka? -__- *masih bete mengejar keterlambatan update*

merangkak sudah cantik dan cepat, meski suka menghalalkan segala cara (bahaya) demi mencapai tujuannya...

duduk masih suka mengkahawatirkan, suka doyong akibat manuver yg suka seenaknya sendiri...

berdiri juga udh gampang, satu tangan ok, dua tangan juga udah bisa, nyender sama perut :D lagi nunggu kapan mau dititah... tapi santai kok, kaya di pantai...

meniru! menirunya makin canggih! bikin deg2an mamanya yg sehari2 sama2... baby imitates that easy, and totally unpredictable...

sekarang lagi suka niruin ketawanya org dewasa yg ha-ha-ha (yg mana emg nggak lama bulan2 belakangan ini, if i wasnt mistaken, i like to do it purposely, laughing with a definite tone, to show him im happy-we're happy) dan diterjemahkan jadi ahk-ahk-ahk... sehingga agak terdengar seperti lg ngeden, dan bikin batuk -__- but it clearly means that he want to join us with a laugh..

beberapa waktu sebelumnya lagi suka jerit-jerit nyaring kalo lagi megang sesuatu, dan kita pegang/ambil sesuatunya itu, sambil melotot menatap mata kita..... daNg..... siapa tuh yg ngajarin.....*tiba2 inget waktu kecil, pernah dibilangin oma kalo mama shaka lg marah sukanya melotot nyeremin kaya kakek* bueh.... musti extra hatihati sekarang.... mas, kamu jgn ikutin yg anehaneh jelek dari mamapapa ya.... yg cutiescuties aja ;)

jadi agak2 mikir kalo dia lagi ngoceh nggak jelas kaya merapal huruf, jangan2 niruin mamanya juga ya... haddeeehh... kapan liatnya....

dan shaka belum bisa tepuk tangan :p kenapa ini jadi milestones (pribadi)? karena tempohari pernah playdate sama wina-sabin, dan sabin yg 1 bln lebih muda udah bisa. ditambah terlihat lebih 'ngerti'. sementara bayi sayangku masih mlongo2 cengengesan aja :D hihihihi... untung masih keliatan cuties.... cup cup.... i enjoy this son.... just take your times happily :)

apa lagi ya.... paling makannya.... yaaaa, sedikit banyak udah nambah sih... mulai dr yg bener spt tomat, mangga, bayam, kabocha... ada juga yg nggak jelas seperti kue lapis, kue putu, honeystars, sampe berbagai label toiletries, tisu, daun, koran, kertas, dan yg nggak asik lagi, sejumput firming cream kaya tadi sore. hah! mudah2an nggak papa. cute to hear, but very not cute to be experienced. huff... target berikutnya, brokoli, ayam, sawi, mujair/lele.... ijo2annya nih, masih kurang bener... udah mau setaun aja. kalo daging2an, bismillah aja. a good vegetarian doesn't seems that bad. toh masih asi, dan kaldu juga. susu tambahan jg, yg agak deg2an... masukin sufor susah bener....

hum.... apa lagi.... oh iya! lagi suka nerobos2 :) cuties deh. ada apa2 maunya diterobos. kolong highchair yg paling sering. meski kadang suka nekat mau nerobos kolong bouncer -__- iya, bouncer kursi toddler itu... oh, sama nerobos tekukan betis-paha pas lagi duduk juga ding...

and he (still) loves books (and even more). bukunya yg life in the city ungu itu, sekarang sudah hafal tempatnya, bisa ngambil sendiri dan membedakannya dengan deretan buku lainnya, dan masih suka (dan anteng) kalo pas dibacain :) meski tetep setelahnya tetep mau dimakan juga.

ummm... thats all i remember for now... :)

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sebenernya masih ada beberapa hal... tapi yang terpenting keliatannya udah. tinggal doanya... mudah2an semua baikbaik aja. sehat, menyenangkan. and that i really really love many things and people around me and its true. may they know it naturally due to my lack of ability to show it *please forgive this lazy stupid wife girl* or else im gonna be sad. sigh. what a cheap flick.

blah whatever. c u soon.

update... update...

Been so long since the last time online with such a big screen *sigh* mana sih nih org telkom, katanya mau pasang modem speedy gratisan... Tiwas nggak ngisi im2...

Days been fine =) after around a week of several adjustments and adaptation, things gone back to normal. I, we, finally had my, our routines back. Mbaknya jg alhmdlh saat ini udh bs jalan sendiri.
Yes. She's a bit slow, and also seems like a slow learner, and not phisically good in hearing too, that it gets me fed up for several times..... Tapi skrg sdh jauh lbh baik.
What's needed is just a full-detailed schedule and rundown. Then she could do the modification later on. She's not very good in being initiative, but maybe somehow, it could be a good point. Udah capek ah sama mbak-mbak yg kebanyak inisiatif dan buntutnya susah dikasitau :p
Umm... The other good point is that she seems like has a thing with shaka. No its not that she could tame him nicely, nor viceversa. Its just that she seems like liking him, my baby. Nggak usah deh bilang sayang atau baik atau lembut atau apa yg indah2.
But I see him able to amaze or surprise or make her laugh easily. And she reacted pretty well at any of his (new) attitude. So then I consider that as 'care' or at least, 'heartful'. Fingercrossed really..... I really do hope this one can work out well...

Sbntr lagi shaka 10 bulan.... Its kinda annoying finding blank spot in my notes of his milestones =( big regret. But things been better and I don't want to ruin it with such (small) things.... So I will just move on.

Gigi sudah 6. Yg ke 6 errupted pas flu minggu lalu, yg dilanjut dgn batuk alergi dimalam hari utk yg ke2 kali. Berarti total 3 kali sakit (flu), semua terjadi saat keluar gigi. Gigi pertama pas 6mos, yg pake demam dan 2minggu nggak sembuh2 full. Gigi ke4 pas brgkt mudik lebaran, yg pake sariawan dan susah makan. Dan gigi ke6 ini, yg pake cranky bites while playing and breastfeeding.
Iyaaa... Setelah sindrom mainan gigi digesekgesek bikin mukanya jd nye ngit, sekarang suka gigit-gigit sakiiit. Masih suka sih mainan gigi, tapi frekuensinya udh nggak sesering pas tumbuh gigi ke5 (yg kelewatan itu >p).

(Ps: keliatannya nggak ada harapan utk meneruskan postingan ini dlm waktu dekat... Its been 2 days since the last paragraph -__- c u, soon I hope)

little missy

Sometimes I wonder how I could survive missing you far away there...

I've been busy for quite a while. I left a lot of things. Events, moments, milestones, and of course, thoughts.

Nanananana... Where should I start...

1st, I think I started to tweet actively since yesterday. I kinda got the 'click' already. Now I sorta understood about what nesha said about blogging in twitter. Due to my lack of time updating this blog or even my daily journal, I guess, yes twitter could be an effective mini blog. But yeah, unconsidering the followers though. But ah, my necessity seem more urgent than that, at least for now, when I don't have any system working yet. I don't want to run out of moments no more... Its sadful. A big loss to me...

2nd, I miss my boys. One of them is surviving his worklife in the jungle, and the other growing up so fast that I can't barely notice every single changes. Its annoying, yet so amusing. Watching every inch of him still feels amazing. Seeing and remembering how he could be delivered here also still feel like a bless. I don't want to forget that, while I began to miss a little bit of this and that. Such as the erruption of the 5th tooth... No matter how cheesy it could be sound, still its very, I mean VERY annoying.

Fuh... The he's in the jungle is always be my best medicine. Ah... Haven't I told about the delivery ya... Earlier then I was remember about his saying right after the delivery, that I was so good and he were so proud of me. Yea, those formal and tipical words that you could easily adopt from a movie scene or magazine. Its just that I know that he's not that smart to lie, he's not that passionated to be such a sweet, and he's even obviously not that smart to control himself by the time. And so, yes I could take those saying from him truthfully.
It makes me think, after all achievements and else, that's the 1st time I really proud of myself. I mean, ME proud with myself, and like it. That's what came to my mind at the night after my baby was born. So this is it what to be proud is. And it feels right, the way I like it.
I had it even double. 1st, I proud that I could make him proud. 2nd, I proud that I could bring the baby good. 3rd, I proud that the baby is mine, ours. Yea, of all the reasons I ever had to be proud, I wonder why I pick those 3 reason.
1st- he might just say it emotionally, 2nd- no actually the process definitely not that smooth, I don't breathe properly (not because of I forgot nor losing control, but I've tried and I failed that its too hurt I can't barely managed), and the 3rd reason- really sounds selfish to me :p (yea let's face it, I make a good friend with contradiction since I don't know when but its already quite long).

But no matter how absurd it sounds, as I said before, I felt damn proud, and it feels right, and I like it. No other comparison. Thank you for both of my boys. I really do hope it could lead me to something good for both of you too. That I could answer your belongs with us here nicely, and that I could bring the pride your father has given to me into reality. And I guess, I would try to proove my rightness to be proud, for let's say, yea, my whole life. Um...yea, I usually don't let my self happy that easy. Its an illness.

Ah... So many things still rounding. And the night started to weigh on my eyes. Um.... I love you ya.

rush hour

I arrived home yesterday, at least :sigh:
I left (too) many things behind. I feel full. I can't record my baby's growth as well. I can't count my days no more. I passed several milestones and dates without noting it down. I feel lost. That makes me kinda irritated :sigh:
I need my routines badly... I'm such a wreck without schedules... I need to maintain myself, or else I tend to ruin up things :sigh:
Things are ruined up already by the way. My right hand is sick. Now I can feel the pain at almost every move, including when I zip and unzip my pants. I can't pick up things neatly, that includes my cup of tea. I can't hold my baby comfortly, that it limits me pretty much to do some plays with him. And I can't keep complaining about the pain, I feel overrated if I do. But yes, tell me I'm spoiled or anything, I need doctor. I don't know what else, and its pretty much ruining my days :sigh:

battery low

i miss you...

i miss home

....

two (fine) days w/ shaka

the good thing of being a full time mother is the ability to keep watching. the good thing of being a working mother is the power of missing.

the good thing of a part timer mother is the combination of both. and the good thing of a part timer mother without helper is the chance to get the most of it.

:menghibur diri sendiri mode on:

got so many things to say actually.

from the good ones. have handed the highchair! graco tea time sprint it is . have established the box! graco pack n' play it is, even with a better pattern and color, thanks to papa for going hunting in itc just like a mad mom =D then its worth every penny.

and both are worked out! it's a definite worked for the highchair, that it suceeds shaka's crave while blw-ing, and he also already got used to be in it while spoonfeeding. and the box did a good job of my main aim, to secure, a safe sanctuary. but not yet his favorite spot to sleep though. but its kinda figured. i'll just wait.

so many new milestones also come from those good ones. uh... i actually want to make it clearer and more detailed... but if i didn't drill it now, im afraid i'll lose it.

my baby is now crawling, half climbing, babbling (sedikit curiga dua kata pertamanya adalah 'udah' dan 'nggak' ...because he seems mentions it a lot, and oftenly came out in such suitable moments). he has found his penis, and cant stop grabbing it harshly. he also has found his mother-toes, and got tasted it too =p

he's also already got used to poo in his potty, or else (i guess) he won't do it satisfactorily. and papaya really do a big great job for it. its his favorite fruit, and so is his must-fruit. since then i dont know is it his poo smelled like papaya, or the papaya which smelled like his poo. so if you ask me about papaya, well, we have an ultimate love-hate relationship =p

he's in love with playing hide and seek, and sometimes like waiting to be surprised or be tickled. and when hes doing that, his eyes won't stop brightly staring and his mouth won't closed. i like it seeing him like a happy life-enjoyer.

the other good things are his wet kisses and his grinny giggles. now it seems like he knows how he made me feel. i gotta be careful. but so far he doing good. like patiently waiting me wake up in the morning by quietly playing by himself, or like this afternoon, calmly accompanying me watching dvd with his dinner on the queue. ha! =D such a nice boy of mine.

then comes the bad ones. the series that flashed in my head few days ago. the spoiled phase of 7mos boy - 2nd time teething - new schedules of foods introduction - out of helper - my classes almost come to its midterm - schedule change of my pick-up person - its ramadhan, means near to lebaran, means near to 1st time travel with shaka, and his solid food, and either heavy or wide demand of rutinity, and also on the contrary, his making of dramatic reactions and movements.

i was kinda fed up back then.what a solid cranky series... it just that now i kinda got the key, so that i could still and hopefully will be able to rule the house. i gotta be showered at least once a day. really, now is the time when shower felt like a luxury. my ultimate recharge moment.

and afterall, i feel blessed having my days off like these 2 days. it really paid off. these are such days that boost me better into monday, such another working day. it just... it'll be even better if i could have more time to preview my lesson plan and prepare my teaching aids.... blah. i will work on it. soon i will got it work. trust me. (yea, im a bit obsessed with mothers without helpers in abroad , so what)

well, i actually kinda like this better than before when the helper's around. being in charge for the house, fully =p its just, i gotta be realistic. for the sake of keeping my head sane, and of course, for the sake shaka's routines.

and anyway, perhaps, in some parts i dont know what, a helper is the thing that makes the good of a good working mother. and for the flaws and the rest, we just have to face it. amen.

may things got back into (a better) routines, soon.

shoot!!!

finally, one bad mood in one series of bad days

stupid elctricity left me no water indeed

stupid me not knowing the manual of water piping

stupid helper not anticipating that before!

stupid runny nose!!!

stupid cough!!!

stupid illness haunting my room and my house and my baby son!!!

stupid allergen haunting my baby son's skin!!!

stupid students being so shallow...

stupid me blaming on small chidren!

stupid financial record!

stupid financial plann!

stupid spender!

stupid pms mom not having her pms coming!

stupid class schedule making me skip my baby's bathing time!

stupid indisciplined mom with her messy personal schedule!

stupid teaching aid which should be provided ownself!

stupid helper being too knick-knack!

stupid helper being herself!

ah...

stupid me with my schedules ruining my schedules with my baby!

ah!!!

july 17th

actually its kinda annoying having one birthday of your love in distance. its like no matter what i do will never seems enough. fuh....

so i'll just wait you come home and grab your present. due to financial pressure, there's nothing so fancy for this year, but still you gonna like it lah ^_^

i'm with you. we're with you. it's like for ever.

daysleeper

lately i forgot feeling sleepy at night

and lately im not good at night sleep

and im not used to take a nap

that now its like i scramble days into one

lately i forgot how delicious a night sleep could be

and lately i dont know how and when to say good night

and so the days seems not over yet

that everything still seems so awake and tasteful

lately i forgot any of my good night sleep

and lately it seems didnt matter that much

i curl beside you as i watch you hear you feel you

the world just simply turns around you, dear

guess thats why i'd like for a companion.

no, i need companion.

and its you.

my only another definition of you.

busy little man

:my oh my, it hasn't been a week since my review, and the new lists are already there in a long queue:

gigi pertamaaaa ^0^ hyaaay! yang diawali dengan demam beneran pertama, di tengah-tengah batuk-pilek pertama yg juga merupakan sakit 'serius' pertama :( yg dimulai di awal makan karbohidrat pertama yaitu bubur beras merah yg ditolak habis2an lewat huek-huek imut yg setelah jadi hueeek beneran jd nggak imut lagi.

hari ini curiga, apa mgkn shaka ga tahan sama beras merah, krn diliat2 merah2 dilehernya (dan mulai di dada dan kepala) lebih seperti merah2 alergi. haaah, apa bnr kt dr.kiki, alergi itu areanya bisa bertambah kalo nggak ditangani, haaaaahhh.... ini lagi masanya coba2 makanan pun. habis alergi apa lagi, tk rasanya udh nggak makan apa2 yg aneh2....

batuknya masih ada. tapi insyaallah setelah kemunculan si gigi, badan udah fit spt semula :) ketawanya, usreknya, rutinitasnya, cuma kasian aja kalo lagi tidur suka kebangun krn batuk... mudah2an cpt sembuh...

oiya, ada lagi yg pertama, yaitu, bongkahan pup pertama! :D mungkin krn kentang ya, hihihi... mudah2an shaka semakin pinter makannya. sbnrnya agak deg2an setiap shaka agak males2an makan karbo (yg nggak manis spt buah2an)

pertama lainnya adalah obat demam tempra, obat pilek alco, kentang, dan air jeruk yg tadi dipake buat ngencerin biar makan kentangnya lebih lahap :p

learning to sit (minus bumbo seat yg mahal itu), learning to crawl and fasten up the manuver (mamanya lap keringet), learning the edge of the bed (biar ga bolak-balik jatoh), learning to drink with spout (karena mamanya ga mau beli doidy cup), learning to have a walk by stroller (karena ternyata lebih sehat drpd digendong), and of course waiting for the growth of the (next) teeth (mudah2an nggak pake cranky). they are also in the schedule of this little man of mine.

fyyyuuuuhhh....

recording #1

:review 6 bulan pertama shaka:

1mo

1st time seeing the world ___ december 31st 2009 ___ from hospital to pamulang

track moving objects ___ since newborn

responds to sounds ___ since newborn

1st long trip ___ early january 2010 ___ by train to batang

1st laid on tummy ___ late january 2010 ___ its calming his sleep

2mos

heads up when lying on tummy ___ late february 2010 ___ he likes it when on papa's chest

mini push up ___ mid february 2010 ___ a steadier and higher heads up

3mos

1st time hair shaving ___ march 31st 2010 ___ in the afternoon

1st time to the mall ___ april 4th 2010 ___ senayan city

1st turn from back to tummy ___ april 19th 2010 ___ at night while half sleeping

definitely able to turn from back to tummy ___ april 22nd 2010 ___ trial and error on the bed

consciously smiling/laughing ___ late april 2010 ___ before papa went to the jungle (again)

start drooling ___ late april 2010 __ wet all over hands and face

4mos

happily yelling ___ whole month ___ it seems like a check sound

self intentionally smiling/laughing ___ early may 2010 ___ gone to a never ending photoshots

able to reach (and want) over toys ___ early may 2010 ___ interests for noise and bold colors

intentionally lean and reach to somebody ___ early may 2010 ___ that somebody is me :)

crazily drooling playfully ___ whole month ___ cant stop eating own hands

5mos

happily mumbling ___ whole month ___ including mimic and talking eyes, mostly when sleepy

eat everything ___ whole month ___ see-find-grasp-pull-eat!

start using cloth diaper ___early june 2010 ___ goal: fully cloth diaper!

able to hunt (and move) into toys ___ mid june 2010 ___ by tummy or feet

1st solid food ___ june 7th 2010 ___ avocado with milk (and then stopped for medication)

started to try turning from tummy to back ___ mid june 2010 ___ when papa's at home

2nd solid food ___ june 21st 2010 ___ banana: BLW & pureed

1st sit on own butt ___ june 23rd 2010 ___ dr.kiki exam @kmc

secretly able to turn from tummy to back ___ june 23rd 2010 ___ a roll at mbah's kingsize bed

1st pose of crawling ___ june 23rd 2010 ___ power of knees on the go

1st consonant mumble ___ mid june 2010 ___ its heard like a- G, D, & B *where's the M??*

play with his hands, feet, and finally found his penis ___ late june 2010 ___ he likes to scratch everywhere :)

understand playing cillukba ___mid june 2010 ___ he keeps waiting somebody shown up

recognize his name ___ mid june 2010 ___ mashaka, it works better

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sufor:

S26, nutrilon HA, pregestimil, nutrilon soya, isomill (lagi mau nyobain)

solid food:

avocado, banana, papaya

medication:

myco-z (salep iritasi/ruam), apolar (salep merah-merah alergi), benoson-n (mirip apolar, tapi ada anti infeksi), nipe (pilek, cairin ingus), mucopect (batuk, cairin dahak), ryzen (anti alergi), BB transpulmin (baby balsam)

toiletries:

head to toe, baby cream, baby lotion, baby oil J&J, hair lotion Cussons, telon Konicare

body wash, liquid talc awk-mothercare, nappy cream little softie mothercare, shampoo cussons

malls: *mamanya kurang kerjaan kalo yg ini :D*

senayan city, bintaro plaza, pondok indah mall, sogo jongkok bintaro, hihihi...

when the (later) time is come (1st letter)

:later will come when the time is come. you'll know it when you know it:

hihihi... statement usil dari mama usil yg habis baca postingan terakhir *hey (later), datengnya jgn cepet2 yaw ^_*

hey shaka baby, i have a present =D this below is your father's first letter, it arrived this noon on facebook. i copy this just in case he forgot documenting this first glorious milestones of him.

karena papanya suka sibuk ngeksis sendiri *hahahah*

Dear son,

I've heard many good things about you in the end of this week you have been successful through the journey at a family gathering without the thundering cries, congratulations. I also heard you will eat papaya today, after yesterday you eat a banana and avocado. I apologize for not always able to accompany you to do good things for the first time. But I'm sure, with your mother by your side, you will be better able to learn how to become a man.

my clarification: no thundering cries, but there still were the famous serial cries though =D hahaha, its ok, mama still likes that. and yes, you eat your first papaya this noon, and you seems like it. and yes, you will become a (good) man. hihihi...

The best thing in this week I've heard is that you have to crawl for the first time, ... yes, you are now a crawling baby.. Congratulation again son,..

my another clarification: it was your first crawl son, but it didnt mean that you already are capable of crawling, ok ^o^ but still, congrats! you already did good on your almost 6mos.

And now, I think is the right time to write my first letter to you, a simple letter that might be a pathway to life in the future. yes, ..I wrote this because you already started to crawl now, you are crawling baby….

Son, may you find serenity and tranquility in a world you may not always understand. May the pain you have known and the conflict you have experienced give you the strength to walk through life facing each new situation with courage and optimism. Always know that there are those whose love and understanding will always be there, even when you feel most alone. May you discover enough goodness in others to believe in a world of peace. May a kind word, a reassuring touch, and a warm smile be yours every day of your life, and may you give these gifts as well as receive them. Remember the sunshine when the storm seems unending.

Teach love to those who hate, and let that love embrace you as you go out into the world. May the teachings of those you admire become part of you, so that you may call upon them. Remember, those lives you have touched and whose have touched yours are always a part of you, even if the encounters were less than you would have wished. It is the content of the encounter that is more important than the form.

May you not become too concerned with material matters, but instead place immeasurable value on the goodness in your heart. Find time each day to see beauty and love in the world around you. Realize that each person has limitless abilities, but each of us is different in our own way. What you feel you lack in the present may become one of your strengths in the future. May you see your future as one filled with promise and possibility. Learn to view everything as a worthwhile experience. May you find enough inner strength to determine your own worth by yourself, and not be dependent on another's judgment of your accomplishments. May you always feel loved.

Son, I think it’s enough, I do not want to write a long letter, which will only make you fall asleep when your mother read it to you.

no, your papa made mistakes here. you (we) won't fall asleep reading this. we even should keep our eyes, our head, and connection to google translate fully awake =D but well, the several times repeat reading could be worth this time. QC passed =) thats why i didnt do any interruption in several paragraph above.

Finally, I deliberately included a few people in this note to tell you, those are some of the great people, and may be will become a part of you, even if the encounters were less than you would have wished, and you can take good things from them all…

and if only i (or you) would add some more person, we can just pick it randomly. the point is that, there are so many good things around, even sometimes its become too many, that its forgiven if in this case, sometimes you just want to throw the coins =)

w/ love,
your dad.

PS: Son, if your mother read this letter too fast for you, tell her to repeat it, more slowly ...

na ah, you won't need me reading this to you. i bet your father just cant help for adding some ps: in the bottom of his letter =p

oh and not to forget, i also add this note below the letter on facebook:

and you can collect my letters someday in some particular times with your father who will tell where the letters are and when the particular time is ^_*

so here you are baby, surrounding by my world of letters ^^ enjoy!

hihihi... *cium pipi terus kabur*

newbie

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#1

too much information will kill you, thats what i heard, and its true. udah beberapa kali ngalamin, pas baru hamil - mau nyari dokter, pas udah hamil - belajar perihal gizi, pas hamil 7 bulan - bikin daftar belanja, pas shaka lahir - belajar kolik, refluks, alergi, dst. dan sekarang - shaka mau mpasi. semuanya berakhir dgn berhenti. stop browsing, and start digesting. krn udh smp eneg sendiri, dalam arti sebenarnya. cuma gatau gimana kok ya tetep ga kapok2 untuk browsing lagi setiap ada 'kasus' baru.

this virtual world really cant stop amaze me with things. sampe terharu. nggak tau mau berterima kasih sama siapa *salahkan hormon pms yg ga kelar-kelar*. mungkin karena sekarang2 ini lagi rada gerah sama label google/dsa minded atau sebangsanya dari (semakin) banyak orang. as if i wont hear any advice from other (real experiences/traditional) sources. as if what i got from google are just a bunch of theories, as if my sources are all only the newest update info from only abroad, and so on.... kok malah curhat *kebiasaan*

shaka hampir 6 bulan =) my points will be added later, just find the purple highlights. udah semakin lanyah guling2an. dari telentang ke tengkurep, sumpah! udah lanyah! kalo dari tengkurep ke telentang bisa, tapi masih kalo ada maunya doang =D contoh: digodain, dipancing mainan, atau krn emg nggak sadar aja. refleks yg masih sering sering sih nyantel di posisi miring =p dan karena itullah pengamanan jadi harus semakin ketat. bahaya bener ninggalin tidur dlm keadaan telentang. akhirnya udah beli evamat buat di samping kasur, setelah 2x menemukan shaka tergeletak di lantai. 1x pas bangun pagi, 1x cuma ditinggal ambil minum. dua2nya pake cengengesan. lucu si... tapi miris euy, bawaannya pingin simulasi ulang, gimana caranya ni bocah bisa sampe situ...

iya,bocah... this mama says my baby now is already a big boy. subjektif bgt ya =D habis kayanya permainan ekspresi dan raut mukanya dan ocehannya dan nangisnya udh semakin komplit. sekarang ditambah lasaknya pun. jadi kalo pas lagi tidur, keliatan bgt perbedaannya. hening, dan be sar. sehat terus ya sayang... mungkin sebentar lagi bisa merangkak. sekarang ngesotnya jg udah bisa maju beneran, purposely, meski pake berjuang dulu. manuver kiri kanan udah canggih. notes: keamanan emg jd semakin urgen.

dan sekarang udah pinter mimik sambil posisi tiduran, belakangan suka kebiasaan tidurnya jd begitu =p is it ok? shaka udh 'bisa' tidur telentang lagi. juga semakin fasih melihat warna/barang yg atraktif, terus diraih, dikejar, dimakan...

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#2

Hari ini hari kedua MPASI. after all browsing and googling, my baby starts his 1st solid foods before 6mos, and the food was banana, real chunky banana, un-pureed =D you people labelling me with a blind google-minded actually should read this actually:

>>>1st solid food ideally (and recommended by experts & doctors) at 6mos

my explanation: i read in some articles, and experiences of mothers in abroad, that every baby has a various time to get ready to eat, commonly at 4-6months. as long as your baby seems like ready to eat, then just go. there are some signs tells it, and shaka shows them all. and its just a week before his 6mos though =p besides, traditionally, babies already be given solid food at 2mos in the old times, and they survived (that includes me i guess). and papa came home by that time =D thats a bit of my ego, i admit that.

>>>1st solid food commonly are cerealia, or the newest today's favorite, avocado

my explanation: at first i want it to avocado+milk. but it was failed by his disturbing flu. i prefer to take it slow, as it was gonna be his first time consuming solid food and also the medicines. the medication should come first, so be it. until then comes yesterday. i was eating banana, shaka seems like drooling, and in a good mood. and the banana is delicious, and seems like harmless =D then i give him half of mine to play teething, and he seems like it. then i saw it as a good start of BLW-ing (Baby Led Weaning). as i want to combine the method of BLW and conventional, then i continue to pisang kerok. ga sampe bagian tengahnya, jadi mudah2an ga bikin susah pup seperti yg sdh diinfokan dimana2. risky? yes i guess. but again, traditionally, most of people in the old times giving bananas for their baby's 1st solid foods, and the babies survived. think, they didnt even know to left the inner part that it could cause constipation.

>>>1st solid food ideally very light puree, and commonly with milk.

my explanation: i wasnt not in the mood of being perfectionist by the time, i enjoyed my baby's good mood while playing with his food. so i ignore that. besides, babies with BLW method could even survived a big chunky piece of potato or apple =p and so i think and i hope, pisang kerok wouldnt do any harm.

>>>and amen.

see, i also do things traditionally. and also trully do considering and filtering information from any sources. we're all actually just the same, wanting the best for the child.

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#3

i really adore the invention of RIM instead of RUM. RIM, Rational Instinct of Moms. Adalah plesetannya RUM, Rational Usage of Medication, yg di sisi lain juga suka diplesetin jd Refusal Use of Medicines =D baru nemu pembahasan tentang ini yg melibatkan resep antibiotik, resep obat bayi batuk pilek, puyer, dan imunisasi pneumokokus *see, how can't i not addicted to browse over symptoms and baby stuff? i even found it unpurposely*

ini seperti halnya juga menemukan label Breastfeeding Without Label (BWL), setelah setelah sekian lama browsing dan ikut forum tetep gentar menghadapi urgensi asi eksklusif. Shaka 1st milk is sufor. and lets say its caused by my lack of infos and efforts before, i cant provide enough milk stocks for him while im away. and this BWL, fully support the goodness of breastfeeding, without discriminating the use of sufor, not even a drop of it. doing breastfeed is good, and thats all. no matter if its combined with sufor or not.

kalo baru dpt info baru kdg2 rasanya ketinggalaaan bgt. mama2 yg lain itu canggih2 bgt. kandungan obat, jadwal imunisasi, kandungan vaksin, resep mpasi, urut2an makanan, dst. its like a never ending feeling of being newbie. makanya bacain dialog di forum, atau artikel asuhan dr, atau website luar, pengaruhnya jd gede bgt. spt skrg shaka udh mulai mpasi jg sbnrnya masih ada banyak pertanyaan, seperti, gimana caranya kita tau porsinya udah cukup? gimana taunya kalo shaka udah kenyang? kapan perlu nambahin porsi? sebanyak apa shaka sebaiknya minum air putih setelah makan? gimana takaran bubur susu nya? kalo langsung pake air aja gimana? ...tapi yg udah berjalan harus berjalan. jd cm bisa insyaallah info yg udh didapet berguna buat pegangan (dan tetep browsing case by case).

nggak boleh bingung. karena kalo mamanya bingung, mbaknya ikut bingung, kalo mbaknya bingung, pasti dia inisiatif tanya2 tetangga, lebih banyak lagi info yg masuk, pada akhirnya bikin mamanya tambah bingung. karena kalo mamanya bingung, papanya lebih bingung, udah jauh bawaannya kuatir, nggak asik deh pokoknya. karena kalo mamanya bingung, mesti lebih susah hura-hura, anaknya ikut bingung deh =D jadi mamanya nggak bingung. hihihi...

mungkin itu contoh kenapa belakangan kerasa positif bgt ikutan forum dan blogwalking. nggak terlalu merasa bingung sendirian. seperti pasca melahirkan bulan pertama, blog-nya chia sungguh sangat membantu meredakan emosi dan tendensi baby blues a.k.a post natal depression. accepting the feeling, that its just common.

spt setelah ngubek2 beberapa forum, pilihannya ternyata jatuh ke urban mama. paling nyaman disitu =) mungkin karena background membernya relatif mirip tk jadi terasa familiar. mungkin jg karena slogannya. it tells all: there is always a different story in every parenting style. it means: there are different stories, there are a lot of parenting styles, dan semuanya halal =D

habis tk sharing sama siapa lagiiiii =p i need to talk and discuss about my baby. i need to find info about my baby. but it seems hard to do that in real. every words spoken tend to be considered as either an offense or defense. ngobrol sama single friends rentan jadi org tua yg ngomongin anaknya terus, rentan jadi mama baru yg ngomongin ttg parenting terus. ngobrol sama friends/relatives with babies rentan berakhir dgn label internet-minded, atau malah jd seperti ngotot2an dgn cara mengasuh bayi masing2 =p i dont want to be that kind of yucky moms.

and somehow, slogannya urban mama bikin tk lebih tenang, mudah2an bikin lebih bijaksana jg =) belakangan agak menghindari memberi masukan/info tanpa diminta. kecuali kalo yg sifatnya lumayan fatal kalo nggak dikasitau kasian anaknya... meski pada akhirnya ya terserah org tuanya si, tp kan paling nggak udah dikasi tau... *kalo yg itu emg udh jd kebiasaan =p maaf... tk akan sebisa mungkin mana yg fatal mana yg nggak...* anyhow, think every child needs their parents to be calm and have faith.

bismillah, insyaallah, amin. alhamdulillah...

:.....oh i know it this is gonna be a long posting... its been a while euy... kemaren2 rumah rame bener, baru skrg rehat deh =):

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#4

sejujurnya belakangan lg mulai resah sama persoalan finansial =D gyaaah! ini cicilan 4jt tiap bulannya udah nggak kekejar. meski kalo review emg nggak ada 'uang ilang' tapi habis ini bener2 harus irit. bahkan untuk shaka *karena ternyata belanja terbanyak emg buat shaka =p yg mana ternyata emg jd penyakit setiap mama baru* no more toys, fancy items and tools, habisin stok kioshaka segera, cairin allianz. maaf ya adeeek... but anyhow i will still buy you the playpen and highchair ^^v gyah!

terus berhitung ulang untuk rumah, sehingga uang pinjaman nggak cuma habis buat bayar cicilannya, rumah bisa segera dibangun, dan bisa ditempatin per maret 2011..... GYAH! target yg gila2an ya sebenernya.... tapi kalo nggak gitu berarti harus bayar kontrakan lagi, dan dgn kondisi finansial sekarang, akan semakin nggak kekejar utk bayar cicilan... amiiin...

but in the mean time, lately i often found myself unconsciously staring at everything near and get sunk in a deep grace. my baby, my rooms, my house, my stuffs, stuffs for my baby, and else, that they're all seems so much like luxurious magic. manifestasi resah kali yah =p fuh..... anyhow hope it helps to bring some positive energy for many days ahead. selebihnya adalah, HARUS BERTINDAK!

sehingga isyu sekolah shaka jadi ikut muncul. hitung2an biaya pendidikan ikut bikin gila. the good thing comes together with it, i found some articles about investing. keyword awalnya adalah tabungan pendidikan atau asuransi pendidikan, then i ended up in keyword reksadana. dont know anything about it. it seems too complicated, too difficult, too technical. it seems not in my coverage area.

tapi karena harus bertindak tadi =p i have to digest it. perkembangan terakhir adalah, tertarik untuk mulai reksadana resiko rendah (reksadana ada 4 jenis, 2 jenis diantaranya resiko rendah, tapi lupa namanya apa, its still blurry to me though), dan bank yg paling recommended untuk itu adalah commonwealth (gyakh, bank apa lagi tu...). berhenti disitu. sekarang lagi clingak-clinguk ada nggak bank commonwealth di seputaran bintaro, maksudnya mau didatengin dan tanya2 (setelah udah nyempetin masuk bank niaga untuk tanya2 ttg tabungan pendidikannya yg terkenal itu) i'll take it slow.

and guess what, oma kemaren nanyain, "tik, kamu mau nggak diprospek temenku, aku nggak enak nih udah nolak terus, padahal temen deket. nggak harus mau nggak papa, kan di rumah jg bisa"

...udah males "ha, diprospek apaan..."

"apa ya, mama jg nggak gitu jelas, investasi2 gitu, ...danareksa apa ya", setelah beberapa kali salah nyebut namanya...

wink, mulai tertarik... "perusahaannya apa, bank nya apa?"

"commonwealth. mama juga nggak tau juga sih bank itu,... tapi nggak harus mau kok. didengerin aja", oma mulai ga pede nyebut nama bank yg nggak umum.

gyaaah! kok pas banget..... "iya deh, mau cobain, nggak harus mau kan..."

hope thats trully a good sign... what a super coincidence... bismillah yah...

:menarik nafas... this really is a long posting for me, and a super long posting as a mom =p it takes me 3 days to finis writing... hihihi:

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#5

i am a female. im sorry, but I will always have a little essence of me. i am a wife. trust me, im always in a way to eliminate my self as well. i am a mother. and even when im becoming a female and a wife, i will always be a mother.

do you see my point, baby?

i am only such a selfish female of me, if I couldnt let you out of my hug. i am only be a spoiled wife of your papa, if I could only trust him to give you a hug. its because and only because I am a mother, or at least properly try to be one, that I would let go of your hug, and still considerately smiling.

I will just always be here.

ps: and so i pleased you (later) dear, go fly up high ^^