mid day sun day
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
what've been done before A year :countdown:
Monday, December 27, 2010
what to do after A year :countdown:
menjelang shaka 1 tahun, menjelang tahun baru, dan mumpung papanya shaka lagi nggak di rumah dan ngaja ikea-an terus... mama mau bikin planning...
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
mother's day posting
Saturday, December 18, 2010
my ikea wishlist :revised:
Monday, November 08, 2010
so little time so much to do
Apalagi yang kurang,
Kalau kau berlari smakin cepat,
Tanganmu tlah ada kehangatan,
Apalagi yang kurang
Friday, October 22, 2010
update... update...
Days been fine =) after around a week of several adjustments and adaptation, things gone back to normal. I, we, finally had my, our routines back. Mbaknya jg alhmdlh saat ini udh bs jalan sendiri.
Yes. She's a bit slow, and also seems like a slow learner, and not phisically good in hearing too, that it gets me fed up for several times..... Tapi skrg sdh jauh lbh baik.
What's needed is just a full-detailed schedule and rundown. Then she could do the modification later on. She's not very good in being initiative, but maybe somehow, it could be a good point. Udah capek ah sama mbak-mbak yg kebanyak inisiatif dan buntutnya susah dikasitau :p
Umm... The other good point is that she seems like has a thing with shaka. No its not that she could tame him nicely, nor viceversa. Its just that she seems like liking him, my baby. Nggak usah deh bilang sayang atau baik atau lembut atau apa yg indah2.
But I see him able to amaze or surprise or make her laugh easily. And she reacted pretty well at any of his (new) attitude. So then I consider that as 'care' or at least, 'heartful'. Fingercrossed really..... I really do hope this one can work out well...
Sbntr lagi shaka 10 bulan.... Its kinda annoying finding blank spot in my notes of his milestones =( big regret. But things been better and I don't want to ruin it with such (small) things.... So I will just move on.
Gigi sudah 6. Yg ke 6 errupted pas flu minggu lalu, yg dilanjut dgn batuk alergi dimalam hari utk yg ke2 kali. Berarti total 3 kali sakit (flu), semua terjadi saat keluar gigi. Gigi pertama pas 6mos, yg pake demam dan 2minggu nggak sembuh2 full. Gigi ke4 pas brgkt mudik lebaran, yg pake sariawan dan susah makan. Dan gigi ke6 ini, yg pake cranky bites while playing and breastfeeding.
Iyaaa... Setelah sindrom mainan gigi digesekgesek bikin mukanya jd nye ngit, sekarang suka gigit-gigit sakiiit. Masih suka sih mainan gigi, tapi frekuensinya udh nggak sesering pas tumbuh gigi ke5 (yg kelewatan itu >p).
(Ps: keliatannya nggak ada harapan utk meneruskan postingan ini dlm waktu dekat... Its been 2 days since the last paragraph -__- c u, soon I hope)
Sunday, October 03, 2010
little missy
I've been busy for quite a while. I left a lot of things. Events, moments, milestones, and of course, thoughts.
Nanananana... Where should I start...
1st, I think I started to tweet actively since yesterday. I kinda got the 'click' already. Now I sorta understood about what nesha said about blogging in twitter. Due to my lack of time updating this blog or even my daily journal, I guess, yes twitter could be an effective mini blog. But yeah, unconsidering the followers though. But ah, my necessity seem more urgent than that, at least for now, when I don't have any system working yet. I don't want to run out of moments no more... Its sadful. A big loss to me...
2nd, I miss my boys. One of them is surviving his worklife in the jungle, and the other growing up so fast that I can't barely notice every single changes. Its annoying, yet so amusing. Watching every inch of him still feels amazing. Seeing and remembering how he could be delivered here also still feel like a bless. I don't want to forget that, while I began to miss a little bit of this and that. Such as the erruption of the 5th tooth... No matter how cheesy it could be sound, still its very, I mean VERY annoying.
Fuh... The he's in the jungle is always be my best medicine. Ah... Haven't I told about the delivery ya... Earlier then I was remember about his saying right after the delivery, that I was so good and he were so proud of me. Yea, those formal and tipical words that you could easily adopt from a movie scene or magazine. Its just that I know that he's not that smart to lie, he's not that passionated to be such a sweet, and he's even obviously not that smart to control himself by the time. And so, yes I could take those saying from him truthfully.
It makes me think, after all achievements and else, that's the 1st time I really proud of myself. I mean, ME proud with myself, and like it. That's what came to my mind at the night after my baby was born. So this is it what to be proud is. And it feels right, the way I like it.
I had it even double. 1st, I proud that I could make him proud. 2nd, I proud that I could bring the baby good. 3rd, I proud that the baby is mine, ours. Yea, of all the reasons I ever had to be proud, I wonder why I pick those 3 reason.
1st- he might just say it emotionally, 2nd- no actually the process definitely not that smooth, I don't breathe properly (not because of I forgot nor losing control, but I've tried and I failed that its too hurt I can't barely managed), and the 3rd reason- really sounds selfish to me :p (yea let's face it, I make a good friend with contradiction since I don't know when but its already quite long).
But no matter how absurd it sounds, as I said before, I felt damn proud, and it feels right, and I like it. No other comparison. Thank you for both of my boys. I really do hope it could lead me to something good for both of you too. That I could answer your belongs with us here nicely, and that I could bring the pride your father has given to me into reality. And I guess, I would try to proove my rightness to be proud, for let's say, yea, my whole life. Um...yea, I usually don't let my self happy that easy. Its an illness.
Ah... So many things still rounding. And the night started to weigh on my eyes. Um.... I love you ya.
Friday, September 17, 2010
rush hour
I left (too) many things behind. I feel full. I can't record my baby's growth as well. I can't count my days no more. I passed several milestones and dates without noting it down. I feel lost. That makes me kinda irritated :sigh:
I need my routines badly... I'm such a wreck without schedules... I need to maintain myself, or else I tend to ruin up things :sigh:
Things are ruined up already by the way. My right hand is sick. Now I can feel the pain at almost every move, including when I zip and unzip my pants. I can't pick up things neatly, that includes my cup of tea. I can't hold my baby comfortly, that it limits me pretty much to do some plays with him. And I can't keep complaining about the pain, I feel overrated if I do. But yes, tell me I'm spoiled or anything, I need doctor. I don't know what else, and its pretty much ruining my days :sigh:
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Saturday, August 14, 2010
two (fine) days w/ shaka
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
shoot!!!
Saturday, July 17, 2010
july 17th
Sunday, July 04, 2010
daysleeper
busy little man
Monday, June 28, 2010
recording #1
Sunday, June 27, 2010
when the (later) time is come (1st letter)
I've heard many good things about you in the end of this week you have been successful through the journey at a family gathering without the thundering cries, congratulations. I also heard you will eat papaya today, after yesterday you eat a banana and avocado. I apologize for not always able to accompany you to do good things for the first time. But I'm sure, with your mother by your side, you will be better able to learn how to become a man.
The best thing in this week I've heard is that you have to crawl for the first time, ... yes, you are now a crawling baby.. Congratulation again son,..
And now, I think is the right time to write my first letter to you, a simple letter that might be a pathway to life in the future. yes, ..I wrote this because you already started to crawl now, you are crawling baby….
Son, may you find serenity and tranquility in a world you may not always understand. May the pain you have known and the conflict you have experienced give you the strength to walk through life facing each new situation with courage and optimism. Always know that there are those whose love and understanding will always be there, even when you feel most alone. May you discover enough goodness in others to believe in a world of peace. May a kind word, a reassuring touch, and a warm smile be yours every day of your life, and may you give these gifts as well as receive them. Remember the sunshine when the storm seems unending.
Teach love to those who hate, and let that love embrace you as you go out into the world. May the teachings of those you admire become part of you, so that you may call upon them. Remember, those lives you have touched and whose have touched yours are always a part of you, even if the encounters were less than you would have wished. It is the content of the encounter that is more important than the form.
May you not become too concerned with material matters, but instead place immeasurable value on the goodness in your heart. Find time each day to see beauty and love in the world around you. Realize that each person has limitless abilities, but each of us is different in our own way. What you feel you lack in the present may become one of your strengths in the future. May you see your future as one filled with promise and possibility. Learn to view everything as a worthwhile experience. May you find enough inner strength to determine your own worth by yourself, and not be dependent on another's judgment of your accomplishments. May you always feel loved.
Son, I think it’s enough, I do not want to write a long letter, which will only make you fall asleep when your mother read it to you.
Finally, I deliberately included a few people in this note to tell you, those are some of the great people, and may be will become a part of you, even if the encounters were less than you would have wished, and you can take good things from them all…
w/ love,
your dad.
PS: Son, if your mother read this letter too fast for you, tell her to repeat it, more slowly ...
Friday, June 25, 2010
newbie
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#1
too much information will kill you, thats what i heard, and its true. udah beberapa kali ngalamin, pas baru hamil - mau nyari dokter, pas udah hamil - belajar perihal gizi, pas hamil 7 bulan - bikin daftar belanja, pas shaka lahir - belajar kolik, refluks, alergi, dst. dan sekarang - shaka mau mpasi. semuanya berakhir dgn berhenti. stop browsing, and start digesting. krn udh smp eneg sendiri, dalam arti sebenarnya. cuma gatau gimana kok ya tetep ga kapok2 untuk browsing lagi setiap ada 'kasus' baru.
this virtual world really cant stop amaze me with things. sampe terharu. nggak tau mau berterima kasih sama siapa *salahkan hormon pms yg ga kelar-kelar*. mungkin karena sekarang2 ini lagi rada gerah sama label google/dsa minded atau sebangsanya dari (semakin) banyak orang. as if i wont hear any advice from other (real experiences/traditional) sources. as if what i got from google are just a bunch of theories, as if my sources are all only the newest update info from only abroad, and so on.... kok malah curhat *kebiasaan*
shaka hampir 6 bulan =) my points will be added later, just find the purple highlights. udah semakin lanyah guling2an. dari telentang ke tengkurep, sumpah! udah lanyah! kalo dari tengkurep ke telentang bisa, tapi masih kalo ada maunya doang =D contoh: digodain, dipancing mainan, atau krn emg nggak sadar aja. refleks yg masih sering sering sih nyantel di posisi miring =p dan karena itullah pengamanan jadi harus semakin ketat. bahaya bener ninggalin tidur dlm keadaan telentang. akhirnya udah beli evamat buat di samping kasur, setelah 2x menemukan shaka tergeletak di lantai. 1x pas bangun pagi, 1x cuma ditinggal ambil minum. dua2nya pake cengengesan. lucu si... tapi miris euy, bawaannya pingin simulasi ulang, gimana caranya ni bocah bisa sampe situ...
iya,bocah... this mama says my baby now is already a big boy. subjektif bgt ya =D habis kayanya permainan ekspresi dan raut mukanya dan ocehannya dan nangisnya udh semakin komplit. sekarang ditambah lasaknya pun. jadi kalo pas lagi tidur, keliatan bgt perbedaannya. hening, dan be sar. sehat terus ya sayang... mungkin sebentar lagi bisa merangkak. sekarang ngesotnya jg udah bisa maju beneran, purposely, meski pake berjuang dulu. manuver kiri kanan udah canggih. notes: keamanan emg jd semakin urgen.
dan sekarang udah pinter mimik sambil posisi tiduran, belakangan suka kebiasaan tidurnya jd begitu =p is it ok? shaka udh 'bisa' tidur telentang lagi. juga semakin fasih melihat warna/barang yg atraktif, terus diraih, dikejar, dimakan...
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#2
Hari ini hari kedua MPASI. after all browsing and googling, my baby starts his 1st solid foods before 6mos, and the food was banana, real chunky banana, un-pureed =D you people labelling me with a blind google-minded actually should read this actually:
>>>1st solid food ideally (and recommended by experts & doctors) at 6mos
my explanation: i read in some articles, and experiences of mothers in abroad, that every baby has a various time to get ready to eat, commonly at 4-6months. as long as your baby seems like ready to eat, then just go. there are some signs tells it, and shaka shows them all. and its just a week before his 6mos though =p besides, traditionally, babies already be given solid food at 2mos in the old times, and they survived (that includes me i guess). and papa came home by that time =D thats a bit of my ego, i admit that.
>>>1st solid food commonly are cerealia, or the newest today's favorite, avocado
my explanation: at first i want it to avocado+milk. but it was failed by his disturbing flu. i prefer to take it slow, as it was gonna be his first time consuming solid food and also the medicines. the medication should come first, so be it. until then comes yesterday. i was eating banana, shaka seems like drooling, and in a good mood. and the banana is delicious, and seems like harmless =D then i give him half of mine to play teething, and he seems like it. then i saw it as a good start of BLW-ing (Baby Led Weaning). as i want to combine the method of BLW and conventional, then i continue to pisang kerok. ga sampe bagian tengahnya, jadi mudah2an ga bikin susah pup seperti yg sdh diinfokan dimana2. risky? yes i guess. but again, traditionally, most of people in the old times giving bananas for their baby's 1st solid foods, and the babies survived. think, they didnt even know to left the inner part that it could cause constipation.
>>>1st solid food ideally very light puree, and commonly with milk.
my explanation: i wasnt not in the mood of being perfectionist by the time, i enjoyed my baby's good mood while playing with his food. so i ignore that. besides, babies with BLW method could even survived a big chunky piece of potato or apple =p and so i think and i hope, pisang kerok wouldnt do any harm.
>>>and amen.
see, i also do things traditionally. and also trully do considering and filtering information from any sources. we're all actually just the same, wanting the best for the child.
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#3
i really adore the invention of RIM instead of RUM. RIM, Rational Instinct of Moms. Adalah plesetannya RUM, Rational Usage of Medication, yg di sisi lain juga suka diplesetin jd Refusal Use of Medicines =D baru nemu pembahasan tentang ini yg melibatkan resep antibiotik, resep obat bayi batuk pilek, puyer, dan imunisasi pneumokokus *see, how can't i not addicted to browse over symptoms and baby stuff? i even found it unpurposely*
ini seperti halnya juga menemukan label Breastfeeding Without Label (BWL), setelah setelah sekian lama browsing dan ikut forum tetep gentar menghadapi urgensi asi eksklusif. Shaka 1st milk is sufor. and lets say its caused by my lack of infos and efforts before, i cant provide enough milk stocks for him while im away. and this BWL, fully support the goodness of breastfeeding, without discriminating the use of sufor, not even a drop of it. doing breastfeed is good, and thats all. no matter if its combined with sufor or not.
kalo baru dpt info baru kdg2 rasanya ketinggalaaan bgt. mama2 yg lain itu canggih2 bgt. kandungan obat, jadwal imunisasi, kandungan vaksin, resep mpasi, urut2an makanan, dst. its like a never ending feeling of being newbie. makanya bacain dialog di forum, atau artikel asuhan dr, atau website luar, pengaruhnya jd gede bgt. spt skrg shaka udh mulai mpasi jg sbnrnya masih ada banyak pertanyaan, seperti, gimana caranya kita tau porsinya udah cukup? gimana taunya kalo shaka udah kenyang? kapan perlu nambahin porsi? sebanyak apa shaka sebaiknya minum air putih setelah makan? gimana takaran bubur susu nya? kalo langsung pake air aja gimana? ...tapi yg udah berjalan harus berjalan. jd cm bisa insyaallah info yg udh didapet berguna buat pegangan (dan tetep browsing case by case).
nggak boleh bingung. karena kalo mamanya bingung, mbaknya ikut bingung, kalo mbaknya bingung, pasti dia inisiatif tanya2 tetangga, lebih banyak lagi info yg masuk, pada akhirnya bikin mamanya tambah bingung. karena kalo mamanya bingung, papanya lebih bingung, udah jauh bawaannya kuatir, nggak asik deh pokoknya. karena kalo mamanya bingung, mesti lebih susah hura-hura, anaknya ikut bingung deh =D jadi mamanya nggak bingung. hihihi...
mungkin itu contoh kenapa belakangan kerasa positif bgt ikutan forum dan blogwalking. nggak terlalu merasa bingung sendirian. seperti pasca melahirkan bulan pertama, blog-nya chia sungguh sangat membantu meredakan emosi dan tendensi baby blues a.k.a post natal depression. accepting the feeling, that its just common.
spt setelah ngubek2 beberapa forum, pilihannya ternyata jatuh ke urban mama. paling nyaman disitu =) mungkin karena background membernya relatif mirip tk jadi terasa familiar. mungkin jg karena slogannya. it tells all: there is always a different story in every parenting style. it means: there are different stories, there are a lot of parenting styles, dan semuanya halal =D
habis tk sharing sama siapa lagiiiii =p i need to talk and discuss about my baby. i need to find info about my baby. but it seems hard to do that in real. every words spoken tend to be considered as either an offense or defense. ngobrol sama single friends rentan jadi org tua yg ngomongin anaknya terus, rentan jadi mama baru yg ngomongin ttg parenting terus. ngobrol sama friends/relatives with babies rentan berakhir dgn label internet-minded, atau malah jd seperti ngotot2an dgn cara mengasuh bayi masing2 =p i dont want to be that kind of yucky moms.
and somehow, slogannya urban mama bikin tk lebih tenang, mudah2an bikin lebih bijaksana jg =) belakangan agak menghindari memberi masukan/info tanpa diminta. kecuali kalo yg sifatnya lumayan fatal kalo nggak dikasitau kasian anaknya... meski pada akhirnya ya terserah org tuanya si, tp kan paling nggak udah dikasi tau... *kalo yg itu emg udh jd kebiasaan =p maaf... tk akan sebisa mungkin mana yg fatal mana yg nggak...* anyhow, think every child needs their parents to be calm and have faith.
bismillah, insyaallah, amin. alhamdulillah...
:.....oh i know it this is gonna be a long posting... its been a while euy... kemaren2 rumah rame bener, baru skrg rehat deh =):
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#4
sejujurnya belakangan lg mulai resah sama persoalan finansial =D gyaaah! ini cicilan 4jt tiap bulannya udah nggak kekejar. meski kalo review emg nggak ada 'uang ilang' tapi habis ini bener2 harus irit. bahkan untuk shaka *karena ternyata belanja terbanyak emg buat shaka =p yg mana ternyata emg jd penyakit setiap mama baru* no more toys, fancy items and tools, habisin stok kioshaka segera, cairin allianz. maaf ya adeeek... but anyhow i will still buy you the playpen and highchair ^^v gyah!
terus berhitung ulang untuk rumah, sehingga uang pinjaman nggak cuma habis buat bayar cicilannya, rumah bisa segera dibangun, dan bisa ditempatin per maret 2011..... GYAH! target yg gila2an ya sebenernya.... tapi kalo nggak gitu berarti harus bayar kontrakan lagi, dan dgn kondisi finansial sekarang, akan semakin nggak kekejar utk bayar cicilan... amiiin...
but in the mean time, lately i often found myself unconsciously staring at everything near and get sunk in a deep grace. my baby, my rooms, my house, my stuffs, stuffs for my baby, and else, that they're all seems so much like luxurious magic. manifestasi resah kali yah =p fuh..... anyhow hope it helps to bring some positive energy for many days ahead. selebihnya adalah, HARUS BERTINDAK!
sehingga isyu sekolah shaka jadi ikut muncul. hitung2an biaya pendidikan ikut bikin gila. the good thing comes together with it, i found some articles about investing. keyword awalnya adalah tabungan pendidikan atau asuransi pendidikan, then i ended up in keyword reksadana. dont know anything about it. it seems too complicated, too difficult, too technical. it seems not in my coverage area.
tapi karena harus bertindak tadi =p i have to digest it. perkembangan terakhir adalah, tertarik untuk mulai reksadana resiko rendah (reksadana ada 4 jenis, 2 jenis diantaranya resiko rendah, tapi lupa namanya apa, its still blurry to me though), dan bank yg paling recommended untuk itu adalah commonwealth (gyakh, bank apa lagi tu...). berhenti disitu. sekarang lagi clingak-clinguk ada nggak bank commonwealth di seputaran bintaro, maksudnya mau didatengin dan tanya2 (setelah udah nyempetin masuk bank niaga untuk tanya2 ttg tabungan pendidikannya yg terkenal itu) i'll take it slow.
and guess what, oma kemaren nanyain, "tik, kamu mau nggak diprospek temenku, aku nggak enak nih udah nolak terus, padahal temen deket. nggak harus mau nggak papa, kan di rumah jg bisa"
...udah males "ha, diprospek apaan..."
"apa ya, mama jg nggak gitu jelas, investasi2 gitu, ...danareksa apa ya", setelah beberapa kali salah nyebut namanya...
wink, mulai tertarik... "perusahaannya apa, bank nya apa?"
"commonwealth. mama juga nggak tau juga sih bank itu,... tapi nggak harus mau kok. didengerin aja", oma mulai ga pede nyebut nama bank yg nggak umum.
gyaaah! kok pas banget..... "iya deh, mau cobain, nggak harus mau kan..."
hope thats trully a good sign... what a super coincidence... bismillah yah...
:menarik nafas... this really is a long posting for me, and a super long posting as a mom =p it takes me 3 days to finis writing... hihihi:
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#5
i am a female. im sorry, but I will always have a little essence of me. i am a wife. trust me, im always in a way to eliminate my self as well. i am a mother. and even when im becoming a female and a wife, i will always be a mother.
do you see my point, baby?
i am only such a selfish female of me, if I couldnt let you out of my hug. i am only be a spoiled wife of your papa, if I could only trust him to give you a hug. its because and only because I am a mother, or at least properly try to be one, that I would let go of your hug, and still considerately smiling.
I will just always be here.
ps: and so i pleased you (later) dear, go fly up high ^^