this post might actually be written about last year, i just found it in my random notebook. guess its when i dont manage to open any laptop. it was made even before my last 2 posts. so here it is, unlike usual, this post is about me. or at least, about whats in my mind pretty recently :)
Hey, when is the right age for kids to learn about the world crisis? to let them know the scarry things beyond monsters and ghost and maybe even zombie. that there are crisisES happen, just right about now, in the other side of the world.
i spy on tv channels, let go adult channels, i go through kids programs, let go adult content and bad words, i scan subliminal messages, let go anything illuminati, bring out new world order, let go lucifer alone, mind the brainwashing. then i read again about zombie invasion, the possibility and horror that seems really haunting. im not kidding you, i did research, i want to have preparation. i feel stupid, but i did build an emergency kit.
then after all those thrilling fun, news breaking about Allepo. the war of the world, like well, nothing new actually. but suddenly i got the approval for my emergency kit. forget about zombie. with all the mess in the world (and in this country lately) even we dont actually need zombie to have a preparation.
i started to read about countries. im trying to swallow politics. i had fun learning history. still, there are sorta stupid feeling to care. because still, nothing are really new and they are all grey. humans do great. maybe silly, but great. i cant lie, i still do have faith, in each and every group/race/team/whatsoever. i just wish that i have the right to hope, that more than anything, Allah SWT be still with us all.
then i found out about MBTI. am an INTP :) its so fun, i cant stop. the information and accuracy kinda beat the astrology hahahhah. but then its getting awkward, there is slight of me dissapointed. its like, every me and you, and now and then, all been sooo predictable. i feel like seeing all the pattern, the fun of MBTI krisskrossing the mess of the world. then just like my mbti has predicted about my type, i do want to bend it.
after all the readings and research, plus my approval and satisfactions, i kinda go to the opposite. there's bit of me want to proof its not all correct, or at least that there are another bended version of the theory or description. i would start with my INTP result. jack of all trades, master of none, rule bender, perfectionist planner, and a lazy ass. i said i was working it, bend the description, and..... actually now i kinda already forgot it. like..... who caress??
its annoying, but i dont feel fail though. now is already few months after this writings. there are some adjustments and changes of course, hopefully good ones. im not buying the issues all that much no more. i do wander and watch and see how it goes, but... i dont know, kinda feel detached already. it still feels scarry in times, but i kinda see thats not really on point. i have better and more important things to focus on. i hope its one good and right revelation.
im going anticlimax for all that horrors. the thrill is there, but... okey, next. is it age? or life path? im not really talking about these insights to anyone, its too overrated, no? i dont know if this an end or start of an era ...but anyway, here i feel like one lucky girl in this phase, you cant imagine how. and if it really is luck, i just wish it would passed on my kids and families :) may Allah SWT be still with us all.
