when i was younger i wanna grow fast,
that i can do everything i want
when im already grown i wanna be smart,
that i can do good things good
when im already smart i wanna be pretty,
that i can be heard better
when im already pretty i wanna be true,
knowing things are real
i know things are real when i make family,
that i dont want anything more
I wrote that 12 years ago, and now I have important points to revise.
to do everything we want is not related to age, but wisdom, which is what comes after gaining knowledge, that comes after we gain some good information.
we don't really need 'that' smart to do good things, and whether it's good or bad, the judgement is not ours. so we can just do it, anytime. Just don't forget the will beneath bismillah.
now this part is an easy one. being pretty may make people look, but not necessarily heard. being brave and sincere may work better.
and this is kinda the... challenging part. truth is, knowing which things are real in this world will always be challenging ...so just consider this only one real definite ultimate thing that we can hold for all times and circumstances. We can always turn back to Allah SWT, as to Him only, we will go back home one day, InsyaAllah.
By the way, I add notes in the last part, a few months later. that is when I've become a mother, I guess. contradictory to "I don't want anything more", I said "I want the world".
the logic behind is, that I think I want to provide as best for my baby and my family. I do, I still do. but later on, I realize how the world can be too overwhelming hahahaa ...and more, later on, i see how it doesn't really matter.
this all everything that happens, is already available as best for us. we already have it all installed in ourselves, all the keys, antidotes, cures, anything. All we need to work on is our efforts and prayers, rest is the matter of His blessing only. All the goodness and wonders are not necessarily caused by our great skill/personality/efforts or even our endless/heartful/sincere prays, but by the blessing of Allah SWT.
so if there is something I want to revise in this last additional part is, never forget that He already created us completely as best, that we just need to turn back to Him every now and then. So that we find Him, understand ourselves, and live a good life within truth & clarity, fulfilling our purpose. Having His blessing for here and after. that is all.
